Profile
Name: Kimmi
Age: 16
School: Ohhhh! That's what it's called!
Birthday: February 24th, 1990
Status: No one's wife
-Maybe promises are better left unsaid-
Archives
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
May 2007
My Lovers
CC
Hunter
Kevin
*cymbal noise*
He's Very Pretty Too!
The Friend I Finally Met
El
Diana
Brian
Freddie
Behind the Camera
...Humming...
Once there was a way to get back homeward,
Once there was a way to get back home,
Sleep pretty darling, do not cry,
And I will sing a lullabye,
Golden slumbers fill your eyes,
Smiles awake you when you rise,
Sleep pretty darling do not cry,
And I will sing a lullabye,
Once there was a way to get back homeward,
Once there was a way to get back home,
Sleep pretty darling do not cry,
And I will sing a lullabye.
If you want me,
Tell me now,
If I could be of any help,
Tell me how,
Let me love you,
Like a friend,
Every little thing is gonna go right in the end.
Well I could hold you too tight,
I could never let you go,
But that wouldn't be right...
I can still recall our last summer,
I still see it all,
Walks along the sand,
Laughing in the rain,
Our last summer,
Memories that we made.
We took the chance, like we were dancing our last dance.
Living is easy with eyes closed,
Misunderstanding all you see.
You were all I never wanted anyhow,
...but I sure want you now...
You may say that I'm a dreamer,
But I'm not the only one.
You're asking me will my love grow,
I don't know, I don't know,
You stick around now it may show,
I don't know, I don't know.
I've seen that road before,
It always leads me here,
Leads me to your door.
When evening shadows and the stars appear,
And there is no one there to dry your tears,
I could hold you for a million years,
To make you feel my love.
Bright are the stars that shine,
Dark is the sky,
I know this love of mine,
Will never die.
You looked my way and said,
"You frustrate me",
Like you're thinking of lines and times,
When you and I were you and me,
I took a chance out on the street,
And I missed my chance and chances are you won't be coming back to me.
There were bells on a hill,
But I never heard them ringing,
No I never heard them at all,
Til there was you,
There were birds in the sky,
But I never saw them winging,
No I never saw them at all,
Til there was you,
And there was music,
And wonderful roses,
They had sent for me,
In sweet fragrent meddows of dawn and dew,
There was love all around,
But I never heard it singing,
No I never heard it all,
Til there was you.
The sun is up,
The sky is blue,
It's beautiful,
And so are you.
Sunday, May 29, 2005
I'm so bad at updating. I guess it's just that a lot of things have been going on lately and I'm way too stressed about finals and such to give a hoot in hell about telling you all about my life. Well, that's gonna change...
Monday-School. Romeo and Juliet try-outs.
Tuesday-Stress. Stress. More stress. Speeches due Thursday and casting/more try-outs til 7. All I wanted to know is what my part was, and to move on from there. So I read Shakespeareish and attempt to act my ass off for a few hours. And...*drum roll inserted here* I GOT JULIET!!! Who is my Romeo you ask. Well, it is none other than the one and only Kevin....I might ruin the play and just hook up with the Apothecary. ;)
Wednesday-Webber's B-day, and a day of being happy for getting a lead. Ester likes my outline too, but I still have to make that godforsaken Visual Aid. Practice til 6 because of...of...oh yah...Bednarcik play. Elliot decides to act, for reasons unknown to mankind...or maybe he just wants to be 'un de nos'.
Thursday-Yay! Didn't do speech today. Decided on maybe doing it Friday. Limelight til 6:30 because everyone was at Wicked. Slackers. *Laughs* That or I'm making up for my mono. The kind Diana drives me home.
Friday-Decided not to do my speech/I didn't get signed up for that day. Tait and I were happy as hell. I got a C on a math test. That's pretty damn good...but that's without the pink sheet, which I failed cuz she wouldn't teach me how to do the darned thing. Brought Michael to Limelight and got taught how to fake hit him. Doesn't matter, cuz I hit him regardless. Go to that boy's house til about 10 and watch Arch explode. That made me giggle. Fell asleep a bit after midnight...I think.
Yesterday- Nothing significant. Stared at lines for a bit, and read the rest of Night. Silly boy should've stayed at Buna the two days. He would've been liberated. Fell asleep at about 11, El called at 12:30ish...Ionno I was half awake I don't remember. I don't remember what I said either, I just remember smiling. I also had a dream about getting ready for prom, but never actually putting on the dress and making it there. I instead ran the track at some Highschool. Yah...I know...I'm a loser.
Now for today. I wake up to CC flailing a pancake in front of my face. I know, she's the best sister ever. I go downstairs in jammie pants and a hoodie to eat my four pancakes with syrup. MMMMmmmm. CC wants to go to Waa-Kee-Shaw park. I asked El to go but he was doing something. We were about to leave when my grandparents rolled in. I finished my Ham&Mustard with some Mayo sandwich and my Mountain Dew as they left to go to my cousins up the street. CC and I ride off to the park, camera and phone hitting my leg the whole way. Not that I'm complaining; it was a 5 minute ride. I take many pictures, CC finds a deer, we climb a huge tree, and go in a deserted barn. *See buzznet for pictures* We get back and play on the swings for a bit, and manage to beat the spits of rain home. I have no clue what I'm doing tonight...but that's okay. I had fun with CC today.
I hear shooting...great...silly deer hunters...you touch my pregnant deer and you die!!!
Monday-School. Romeo and Juliet try-outs.
Tuesday-Stress. Stress. More stress. Speeches due Thursday and casting/more try-outs til 7. All I wanted to know is what my part was, and to move on from there. So I read Shakespeareish and attempt to act my ass off for a few hours. And...*drum roll inserted here* I GOT JULIET!!! Who is my Romeo you ask. Well, it is none other than the one and only Kevin....I might ruin the play and just hook up with the Apothecary. ;)
Wednesday-Webber's B-day, and a day of being happy for getting a lead. Ester likes my outline too, but I still have to make that godforsaken Visual Aid. Practice til 6 because of...of...oh yah...Bednarcik play. Elliot decides to act, for reasons unknown to mankind...or maybe he just wants to be 'un de nos'.
Thursday-Yay! Didn't do speech today. Decided on maybe doing it Friday. Limelight til 6:30 because everyone was at Wicked. Slackers. *Laughs* That or I'm making up for my mono. The kind Diana drives me home.
Friday-Decided not to do my speech/I didn't get signed up for that day. Tait and I were happy as hell. I got a C on a math test. That's pretty damn good...but that's without the pink sheet, which I failed cuz she wouldn't teach me how to do the darned thing. Brought Michael to Limelight and got taught how to fake hit him. Doesn't matter, cuz I hit him regardless. Go to that boy's house til about 10 and watch Arch explode. That made me giggle. Fell asleep a bit after midnight...I think.
Yesterday- Nothing significant. Stared at lines for a bit, and read the rest of Night. Silly boy should've stayed at Buna the two days. He would've been liberated. Fell asleep at about 11, El called at 12:30ish...Ionno I was half awake I don't remember. I don't remember what I said either, I just remember smiling. I also had a dream about getting ready for prom, but never actually putting on the dress and making it there. I instead ran the track at some Highschool. Yah...I know...I'm a loser.
Now for today. I wake up to CC flailing a pancake in front of my face. I know, she's the best sister ever. I go downstairs in jammie pants and a hoodie to eat my four pancakes with syrup. MMMMmmmm. CC wants to go to Waa-Kee-Shaw park. I asked El to go but he was doing something. We were about to leave when my grandparents rolled in. I finished my Ham&Mustard with some Mayo sandwich and my Mountain Dew as they left to go to my cousins up the street. CC and I ride off to the park, camera and phone hitting my leg the whole way. Not that I'm complaining; it was a 5 minute ride. I take many pictures, CC finds a deer, we climb a huge tree, and go in a deserted barn. *See buzznet for pictures* We get back and play on the swings for a bit, and manage to beat the spits of rain home. I have no clue what I'm doing tonight...but that's okay. I had fun with CC today.
I hear shooting...great...silly deer hunters...you touch my pregnant deer and you die!!!
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Monday, May 23, 2005
I only have one thing to say. Huh...lemme try that in spanish. Tengo sola una cosa decir. I think that's right. Anyway, I really only have one meaningful quote that I heard in Oral Comm. today, amongst the abusive boyfriends and sad girls that I spied on. I mean...*shifty eyes*
*Ahem*
"I see evolution more as 'look there's an amoeba, OH now it's a frog'!"
I love that girl.
*Ahem*
"I see evolution more as 'look there's an amoeba, OH now it's a frog'!"
I love that girl.
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Saturday, May 21, 2005
*Types quickly with bulging eyes; freaking out.*
Whatever it is I didn't do it. I don't have all the answers and I never will. Stay away! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Okay...I feel better.
No I'm not insane...just really really slap-happy.
Whatever it is I didn't do it. I don't have all the answers and I never will. Stay away! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Okay...I feel better.
No I'm not insane...just really really slap-happy.
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Friday, May 20, 2005
Babysitting. It's the only thing I do to get money...which isn't proving very helpful lately. Today the 5 year old boy dressed up like a girl, the middle child attempted to bitch at me, and the oldest was obsessed with getting her audition down. She has it memorized, and thinks it's not good enough. My own sister relies on comedy, which is her strong point. I rely on.....nothing. Sure, I have some talent, but do I have enough to...yah. Only time will tell.
I want it to be tomorrow but I'm dreading tomorrow. I'm in such a non-self-motivating state of mind right now...bleh. Half of me wants Juliet and the other half doesn't. That anti-lead half is worried that I'll get like...a tumor or something and miss out on a chance to perform in a big role, and let everyone down again. The good half, which will eventually take over, says that I'm good enough if I apply myself, which I do with anything I like. Then again, every girl that's trying out wants the lead. That's obvious. It's Shakespeare's most known play, and to play Juliet is a dream of the good majority of girls. *Laughs* Kim1 thinks it would be cool if Brian said, "Hey you two are great. 2 nights one of you can be the nurse and the other Juliet, and the other two nights you can switch." Of course I replied to that with, "Yah that's right we could just do the whole show." That girl makes me laugh so hard. Oh well, whatever will be will be, and only time will tell.
Besides, I could always be Stage Manager or something. (HAHAHAHAHA....no....more like costume god)
I want it to be tomorrow but I'm dreading tomorrow. I'm in such a non-self-motivating state of mind right now...bleh. Half of me wants Juliet and the other half doesn't. That anti-lead half is worried that I'll get like...a tumor or something and miss out on a chance to perform in a big role, and let everyone down again. The good half, which will eventually take over, says that I'm good enough if I apply myself, which I do with anything I like. Then again, every girl that's trying out wants the lead. That's obvious. It's Shakespeare's most known play, and to play Juliet is a dream of the good majority of girls. *Laughs* Kim1 thinks it would be cool if Brian said, "Hey you two are great. 2 nights one of you can be the nurse and the other Juliet, and the other two nights you can switch." Of course I replied to that with, "Yah that's right we could just do the whole show." That girl makes me laugh so hard. Oh well, whatever will be will be, and only time will tell.
Besides, I could always be Stage Manager or something. (HAHAHAHAHA....no....more like costume god)
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Tuesday, May 17, 2005
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Monday, May 16, 2005
Life Goal #52- Play dress-up in a/the costume closet.
As a little girl I would always sneak into the closets of my parents, sister, and just about anyone else who had clothes in a closet--it didn't matter if I knew them or not. I loved playing dress-up. I loved the dresses and the suits and the bridal gowns; I loved it all.
I assumed set destruction would be boring as hell, and it was. Cleaning up the dressing rooms was stupid. Why the hell can't actors clean up after themselves? I swear, I threw away at least 7 pair(s) of socks (funny how that's interchangable). I was bored, so someone, I forget who, asked me and Perky to help upstairs with costumes. I realized where we were going, and I regretted the fact that I ever was bored in the first place when I realized that the Mrs. helps run the place. I thought I was going to be stuck in hell for an hour or so.
It all turned out quite different than anticipated. I've been in the costume closet before, but I always am amazed at how little the Limelight closet is compared to this one. LTC has one small rack with (somewhat) neatly assorted, random, clothing. This room has at least 8 huge, double-decker, overflowing racks of any kind and color of clothing you could imagine...not to mention the 3 dozen boxes of ties, vests, and such...and the hat table. I was in little girl heaven. The Mrs. put me to work instantly, having me hang up clothes and such with the point of a finger. I had no idea where the hell I was going, so I followed and she showed me.
We were putting some dresses away, and she and I walked down the same aisle. I said something about how I loved that she can pick up a dress and tell exactly what time period it came from, and for 5 minutes we stood in that row as she showed me all the different time periods--the ugly 70's, the 40's, and old little kid's clothes...stuff like that. I loved it all. She and Mrs. H could tell me where something went or to look for something and I could find almost instantly. It's like one big game of Memory...just with my favorite things--clothes.
So I guess my relationship with The Mrs. is more mutual now. If you like what she likes, it all works out. I'm starting to like her more...and you can point and laugh at me all you want, but I have a big heart; I can take a lot.
PS- So I decided that this summer and next year, I'll play with the costumes at LTC and OHS...plus some acting in there. I finally feel in authority & at home with something...I kinda like it.
PPS- I need some ideas for my persuasion speech. I want to do something meaningful, but I'm drawing a blank...ayudame por favor!!!
As a little girl I would always sneak into the closets of my parents, sister, and just about anyone else who had clothes in a closet--it didn't matter if I knew them or not. I loved playing dress-up. I loved the dresses and the suits and the bridal gowns; I loved it all.
I assumed set destruction would be boring as hell, and it was. Cleaning up the dressing rooms was stupid. Why the hell can't actors clean up after themselves? I swear, I threw away at least 7 pair(s) of socks (funny how that's interchangable). I was bored, so someone, I forget who, asked me and Perky to help upstairs with costumes. I realized where we were going, and I regretted the fact that I ever was bored in the first place when I realized that the Mrs. helps run the place. I thought I was going to be stuck in hell for an hour or so.
It all turned out quite different than anticipated. I've been in the costume closet before, but I always am amazed at how little the Limelight closet is compared to this one. LTC has one small rack with (somewhat) neatly assorted, random, clothing. This room has at least 8 huge, double-decker, overflowing racks of any kind and color of clothing you could imagine...not to mention the 3 dozen boxes of ties, vests, and such...and the hat table. I was in little girl heaven. The Mrs. put me to work instantly, having me hang up clothes and such with the point of a finger. I had no idea where the hell I was going, so I followed and she showed me.
We were putting some dresses away, and she and I walked down the same aisle. I said something about how I loved that she can pick up a dress and tell exactly what time period it came from, and for 5 minutes we stood in that row as she showed me all the different time periods--the ugly 70's, the 40's, and old little kid's clothes...stuff like that. I loved it all. She and Mrs. H could tell me where something went or to look for something and I could find almost instantly. It's like one big game of Memory...just with my favorite things--clothes.
So I guess my relationship with The Mrs. is more mutual now. If you like what she likes, it all works out. I'm starting to like her more...and you can point and laugh at me all you want, but I have a big heart; I can take a lot.
PS- So I decided that this summer and next year, I'll play with the costumes at LTC and OHS...plus some acting in there. I finally feel in authority & at home with something...I kinda like it.
PPS- I need some ideas for my persuasion speech. I want to do something meaningful, but I'm drawing a blank...ayudame por favor!!!
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I was watching Moonlight Mile, and the mother says this to her (almost) son-in-law about how she manages to stay with her husband even though it seems like all they do is fight. She goes on to say that no matter how cold the bed is or no matter how much she and her husband faught that day, he always lies down beside her and puts his arms around her and makes all her worries vanish...without even asking. It's funny, because I do the exact same thing before I go to bed. There isn't any guy that sleeps next to me...well...duh...but one day there will be. It was something that I paused the TV for and thought about for a little bit. Of course, I always think about just failing at love and being left alone on my left side with my ass sticking out in a cold bed. It's something I don't want to ever happen.
I'm too tired to talk anymore...time for some music.
Sunday, May 15, 2005
"There are 4 things I do everything before I go to bed. I slip off my robe, slide in between the sheets, turn on my left side, and stick out my ass."
I was watching Moonlight Mile, and the mother says this to her (almost) son-in-law about how she manages to stay with her husband even though it seems like all they do is fight. She goes on to say that no matter how cold the bed is or no matter how much she and her husband faught that day, he always lies down beside her and puts his arms around her and makes all her worries vanish...without even asking. It's funny, because I do the exact same thing before I go to bed. There isn't any guy that sleeps next to me...well...duh...but one day there will be. It was something that I paused the TV for and thought about for a little bit. Of course, I always think about just failing at love and being left alone on my left side with my ass sticking out in a cold bed. It's something I don't want to ever happen.
I'm too tired to talk anymore...time for some music.
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My makeup is smeared and my hair is a knotted mess. I'm in jammie pants and a beater, and the only thing keeping me up is the insane amount (not much, but it does a lot to me) of caffiene I had after I let El leave to slurp his slurpee. I looked in the mirror and really didn't care; I'm gonna sleep soon anyway.
I thought about writing a whole review of the show, but decided against it. It was good. It was better than good...and I loved it. I just wish I was on stage...but this summer...god I can't wait. I've been away for too long. Damned mono, still don't know where I got that from. So next year will be full of plays...I promised myself that. *Sighs* I'd better get to bed...I have the Who's song stuck in my head at the moment.
PS-Told Peach about my 'special' dream, so I'm never gonna write about it...ever.
I thought about writing a whole review of the show, but decided against it. It was good. It was better than good...and I loved it. I just wish I was on stage...but this summer...god I can't wait. I've been away for too long. Damned mono, still don't know where I got that from. So next year will be full of plays...I promised myself that. *Sighs* I'd better get to bed...I have the Who's song stuck in my head at the moment.
PS-Told Peach about my 'special' dream, so I'm never gonna write about it...ever.
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Friday, May 13, 2005
This has been the longest and one of the most stressful weeks in my life. *Hums Beatles tune* Seussical has just drained me...and really I should be sleeping right now...but I'm not. I feel like writing, because I had gotten the best present ever today.
So this really pretty girl comes up to me as I'm greeting pre-show. My first thought was, Wow...that's insane...she's really pretty...*self pity party here*. Then I thought, hey she looks familiar...she's coming towards me...hmmm...So she says hey and I say hi back. I knew that I knew her...and I guess I thought it was her, but I wasn't 100% sure. She says it's Jaylyn from Little Women. Of course I'm the slow one and finally realize; everything clicked at once. Anyway, there were a lot of hugs and a lot of talking. I only wish I could talk to her more. I missed her and I didn't even notice til I saw her again. It sounds bad but it's true. There are so many things that I should say...that I wanted to say. Maybe I'll ask Doty about it tomorrow.
It just made my day. I had to share it. Now it's off to my golden slumbers...oh remind me to talk about my scary horror-movie dream about Peach tomorrow...hah that was funny.
So this really pretty girl comes up to me as I'm greeting pre-show. My first thought was, Wow...that's insane...she's really pretty...*self pity party here*. Then I thought, hey she looks familiar...she's coming towards me...hmmm...So she says hey and I say hi back. I knew that I knew her...and I guess I thought it was her, but I wasn't 100% sure. She says it's Jaylyn from Little Women. Of course I'm the slow one and finally realize; everything clicked at once. Anyway, there were a lot of hugs and a lot of talking. I only wish I could talk to her more. I missed her and I didn't even notice til I saw her again. It sounds bad but it's true. There are so many things that I should say...that I wanted to say. Maybe I'll ask Doty about it tomorrow.
It just made my day. I had to share it. Now it's off to my golden slumbers...oh remind me to talk about my scary horror-movie dream about Peach tomorrow...hah that was funny.
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Tuesday, May 10, 2005
Ahhh I'm so happy!!! I thought today was going to be a bad day...and it wasn't. Isn't that great?
So this morning I thought I wouldn't see El til after school cuz he had to light up the stage and be a hat...so I went for a walk. After a minute or two, I got bored so I went to go by the band rooms. A voice calls my name. Thinking it was someone else, I turned around, and really it was none other than Mr. X. Not only was I totally surprised (I didn't expect Mr. X to approach me), I wasn't exactly in the mood to confront him...yet. Actually half of me wanted to ask him about some of the things he wrote to me...those things being things I thought were quite faulty, I just hadn't gotten the courage yet. I could've left right then, but I knew it would be better if I wait for him...so I did. We spoke sharply and sarcastically to each other...not necessarily bitchy, but with that very love/hate and "this is the way it's going to be" tone of voice. He left me right before I got to my final destination, and that left me with some hurt and broken feeling. I wanted to cry, to be quite honest.
All first block was me having a conversation with myself. Basically it was 'should I approach Mr. X and speak my mind?' I walked to my locker, and on the way I was stopped by, once again, Mr. X. Kim also popped in to tell me she was hot and to ask for a dollar. He wanted to know if I wanted to talk, and after Kim left I figured that now's as good as any. We talked...and I told him that I realized what I said was...well it was mean, but I don't regret saying it; it's how I felt. I told him that I know he could've just forgotten about it, and how it made me feel better that I could talk to him a bit again.
Gym was full of treading water and laps. During our freetime I sat treading and thinking...and reading the little labels on the pipes on the ceiling. I got off the bus and decided to take another walk, because I had no reason to 'go to my locker'. I was spotted by Mr. X again, and we talked about how he hates flip-flops and I hate socks. I know, I'm a weirdo...but I don't give a damn about what anyone thinks. He said I was insanely honest, so I then asked him why he wrote that I was decietful and a liar. Now the answer he gave [I felt was] somewhat BS-y, but really without that...he wouldn't have much to write. I'll cut some slack. Anyway, the point is things are mutually mutual again, and if my future is a paradise...then...eventually...I will be able to be his friend again. That would make me happy.
I realize I have a thing for befriending troubled boys...why is that?
So this morning I thought I wouldn't see El til after school cuz he had to light up the stage and be a hat...so I went for a walk. After a minute or two, I got bored so I went to go by the band rooms. A voice calls my name. Thinking it was someone else, I turned around, and really it was none other than Mr. X. Not only was I totally surprised (I didn't expect Mr. X to approach me), I wasn't exactly in the mood to confront him...yet. Actually half of me wanted to ask him about some of the things he wrote to me...those things being things I thought were quite faulty, I just hadn't gotten the courage yet. I could've left right then, but I knew it would be better if I wait for him...so I did. We spoke sharply and sarcastically to each other...not necessarily bitchy, but with that very love/hate and "this is the way it's going to be" tone of voice. He left me right before I got to my final destination, and that left me with some hurt and broken feeling. I wanted to cry, to be quite honest.
All first block was me having a conversation with myself. Basically it was 'should I approach Mr. X and speak my mind?' I walked to my locker, and on the way I was stopped by, once again, Mr. X. Kim also popped in to tell me she was hot and to ask for a dollar. He wanted to know if I wanted to talk, and after Kim left I figured that now's as good as any. We talked...and I told him that I realized what I said was...well it was mean, but I don't regret saying it; it's how I felt. I told him that I know he could've just forgotten about it, and how it made me feel better that I could talk to him a bit again.
Gym was full of treading water and laps. During our freetime I sat treading and thinking...and reading the little labels on the pipes on the ceiling. I got off the bus and decided to take another walk, because I had no reason to 'go to my locker'. I was spotted by Mr. X again, and we talked about how he hates flip-flops and I hate socks. I know, I'm a weirdo...but I don't give a damn about what anyone thinks. He said I was insanely honest, so I then asked him why he wrote that I was decietful and a liar. Now the answer he gave [I felt was] somewhat BS-y, but really without that...he wouldn't have much to write. I'll cut some slack. Anyway, the point is things are mutually mutual again, and if my future is a paradise...then...eventually...I will be able to be his friend again. That would make me happy.
I realize I have a thing for befriending troubled boys...why is that?
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Monday, May 09, 2005
I made a friend today. Actually he was my friend before...but now we're more friend-like. Make sense? Anyway, we're kinda both in the same boat...kinda. We both have to learn to let go, but for different reasons. For me it's my desire to know all the answers, even though when asking for them can only cause me trouble. For him, it's the denial of knowing that he can't have what he wants. Both of us have to get over it...and so I told him I'd help him if he'd help me. Oh it'll work...I don't know how, but it will. I told him to go home, sit online, and/or drown his sorrows in a bowl of Cookie Dough ice cream. I LOOOOVEEEE cookie dough ice cream.
Maybe tomorrow will be different...maybe I'll demand answers...
...then again maybe not.
Well since blogger is PMSing...I'll end my rant now.
Maybe tomorrow will be different...maybe I'll demand answers...
...then again maybe not.
Well since blogger is PMSing...I'll end my rant now.
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Friday, May 06, 2005
I realize that I have the talent of learning things on my own quickly. Maybe that'll be something that can get me into college. I put that cute picture in. For the record, I'm not naked. I'm wearing a light purple cami that my hair covers. Don't believe me? Fine. Have it your way. I'm not a porn star...get over it.
Today was nothing much, the boy was sick and I felt really bad. I told him to go home; he wouldn't. He seemed better later though. I tried to help a kid with his speech today, but he didn't want to listen to me and he ended up failing the class. Stupid boy children. I tried to do my good deed, but he's dumb. Turns out he should be a Junior, but he's a sophomore...I don't know how anyone could be that dumb.
Had a little blowout with the family yesterday over my grades. A, A, A+, C+. Geometry is hard, what can I say? Hopefully I got a nice grade on that test today, so that should bring my grade up to a B-. I can handle that.
I realize that I have a love and passion for sunsets and clouds and the sky. I don't know, I guess that the longing and wanting to be free makes me love it. It's beautiful; there's pictures on my buzznet of them. Take a looksee.
I saw someone I once knew today. I looked at him and he looked back. I tried to smile but couldn't, and his pleased expression saddened once he met my gaze. He turned away and I walked by him slowly, wishing to speak a thousand thoughts to him but neglecting to say any at all. Instead I just walked by...down the narrowed street and through the small yet plentiful crowds. I stopped for a second and thought of how I could turn around and this would all be over...and the picture would be perfect again. Gathering my courage I turned around...but you had just turned the corner. You were gone. I may see you again, but I may not have the time to tell you that I wish nothing more than friendship, and although I did the most hateful things...I would wish nothing more but for you to forgive me.
I love that I can write. I think that was decent...anyone care to input?
Today was nothing much, the boy was sick and I felt really bad. I told him to go home; he wouldn't. He seemed better later though. I tried to help a kid with his speech today, but he didn't want to listen to me and he ended up failing the class. Stupid boy children. I tried to do my good deed, but he's dumb. Turns out he should be a Junior, but he's a sophomore...I don't know how anyone could be that dumb.
Had a little blowout with the family yesterday over my grades. A, A, A+, C+. Geometry is hard, what can I say? Hopefully I got a nice grade on that test today, so that should bring my grade up to a B-. I can handle that.
I realize that I have a love and passion for sunsets and clouds and the sky. I don't know, I guess that the longing and wanting to be free makes me love it. It's beautiful; there's pictures on my buzznet of them. Take a looksee.
I saw someone I once knew today. I looked at him and he looked back. I tried to smile but couldn't, and his pleased expression saddened once he met my gaze. He turned away and I walked by him slowly, wishing to speak a thousand thoughts to him but neglecting to say any at all. Instead I just walked by...down the narrowed street and through the small yet plentiful crowds. I stopped for a second and thought of how I could turn around and this would all be over...and the picture would be perfect again. Gathering my courage I turned around...but you had just turned the corner. You were gone. I may see you again, but I may not have the time to tell you that I wish nothing more than friendship, and although I did the most hateful things...I would wish nothing more but for you to forgive me.
I love that I can write. I think that was decent...anyone care to input?
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Wednesday, May 04, 2005
Now Global Studies has always been a great class to discuss/debate things in. In fact, despite the fact that the class gets out of control sometimes, I love it. I really do. I've always liked history, so it's easy for me to pay attention. In the back of our room there's a poster that says (in a big circle with a dash thru it), "Racism. Not in our town." It was the first thing I noticed when I walked in on the first day, and it's become our class motto, thanks to Cam and John.
I've been trying to tame Squiggly lately, but to no avail. He really is a stubborn ass, and things that he believes...they appaul me. This once again became quite clear during a little discussion we had today.
We all had groups of different...political philosophers...I guess. My group had Plato, who isn't a bad guy. I don't agree with him 100%, but I see where he's coming from. Good thing he's dead or he'd try to convert me. Anyway, Squiggly was grouped with 2 girls and this Josh kid, and after Ms. Shay was done giving out the different philosophers, Squiggly asks...
Wait...then who do we have?
You have Mary ***** (I can't remember her name)
Okay...*reads sheet* wait I don't want to be stuck with her.
Well you can have Elizabeth I if you want.
Okay we'll take her. I just don't want to be stuck with Mary ****** (still not remembering name)
*Says jokingly* Why don't you want her? Is it because she's a big women's rights activist and she believed that women and men should be equal?
...Well I just think that women shouldn't have as much power as men, and that women shouldn't be equal to them.
I think every girl in the room gave him a dirty look. Ms. Shay didn't expect that at all. Afterward, Ms. Shay gave Zach a piece of paper and markers and let him draw a sign that said, "Sexism. Not in our town." The class laughed and Squiggly lost another battle.
I know Squiggly is Evangelican. It's obviously some protestant religion, but it seems as if it can be applied to any protestant religion (i.e. Evangelican Presbyterian or Evangelican Lutheran). Now being the smart girl that I am, I decided to look up some facts. I couldn't find anything about their beliefs on feminism or stuff like that...but at least I'm not totally clueless now. I was just wondering if it was Squiggly's personal opinion that women should sit at home and pop out babies, or if it was from his religion. If anyone would like to give me more info on that...please do. I may email my uncle and ask him...he's a priest, he should know.
I'M NOT PREGNANT!
(*Note* There really isn't/wasn't a reason for me to be pregnant in the first place. Mother Nature forgot about me for a second, that's all.)
I've been trying to tame Squiggly lately, but to no avail. He really is a stubborn ass, and things that he believes...they appaul me. This once again became quite clear during a little discussion we had today.
We all had groups of different...political philosophers...I guess. My group had Plato, who isn't a bad guy. I don't agree with him 100%, but I see where he's coming from. Good thing he's dead or he'd try to convert me. Anyway, Squiggly was grouped with 2 girls and this Josh kid, and after Ms. Shay was done giving out the different philosophers, Squiggly asks...
Wait...then who do we have?
You have Mary ***** (I can't remember her name)
Okay...*reads sheet* wait I don't want to be stuck with her.
Well you can have Elizabeth I if you want.
Okay we'll take her. I just don't want to be stuck with Mary ****** (still not remembering name)
*Says jokingly* Why don't you want her? Is it because she's a big women's rights activist and she believed that women and men should be equal?
...Well I just think that women shouldn't have as much power as men, and that women shouldn't be equal to them.
I think every girl in the room gave him a dirty look. Ms. Shay didn't expect that at all. Afterward, Ms. Shay gave Zach a piece of paper and markers and let him draw a sign that said, "Sexism. Not in our town." The class laughed and Squiggly lost another battle.
I know Squiggly is Evangelican. It's obviously some protestant religion, but it seems as if it can be applied to any protestant religion (i.e. Evangelican Presbyterian or Evangelican Lutheran). Now being the smart girl that I am, I decided to look up some facts. I couldn't find anything about their beliefs on feminism or stuff like that...but at least I'm not totally clueless now. I was just wondering if it was Squiggly's personal opinion that women should sit at home and pop out babies, or if it was from his religion. If anyone would like to give me more info on that...please do. I may email my uncle and ask him...he's a priest, he should know.
I'M NOT PREGNANT!
(*Note* There really isn't/wasn't a reason for me to be pregnant in the first place. Mother Nature forgot about me for a second, that's all.)
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Tuesday, May 03, 2005
LIFE GOAL ADDITION
# 51- To dance in the moonlight (summer moonlight, not winter moonlight)
# 51- To dance in the moonlight (summer moonlight, not winter moonlight)
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Today was a great day. I could cry from happiness.
Global Studies- 95% on test. YAY!!!
Gym- Water. Pool. YAY!!!
Oral Comm.- 105% speech. YAY!!!
Geometry- 79.2% on test. YAY!!! (<--Geometry is hard...that's a good grade guys)
Passing periods, before and after school- Boyfriend and friends. DOUBLE YAY!!!
So what if Squiggly is an ass and my hair is turning a greenish color and I'm at a C+ in Geometry class and there's someone I may never speak to again. Overall...it doesn't matter. There are so many more things that are making me happy...life is perfect right now. School will be over in less than 20 days, and I will be free...acting and free...but free nonetheless. I will be able to write from sunup to sundown, and maybe, just maybe, I can achieve some of those life goals. Maybe then I can teach myself more spanish and maybe I'll learn to move on and leave the past behind me. Maybe then I can find a lost friend...and if not...it's not the end of the world. Things change; time does that. You gotta learn to go with the flow on some things, and pick your battles well. *Sits back and smiles* Everything is gonna be okay...too bad that sounds better when someone else says it.
Global Studies- 95% on test. YAY!!!
Gym- Water. Pool. YAY!!!
Oral Comm.- 105% speech. YAY!!!
Geometry- 79.2% on test. YAY!!! (<--Geometry is hard...that's a good grade guys)
Passing periods, before and after school- Boyfriend and friends. DOUBLE YAY!!!
So what if Squiggly is an ass and my hair is turning a greenish color and I'm at a C+ in Geometry class and there's someone I may never speak to again. Overall...it doesn't matter. There are so many more things that are making me happy...life is perfect right now. School will be over in less than 20 days, and I will be free...acting and free...but free nonetheless. I will be able to write from sunup to sundown, and maybe, just maybe, I can achieve some of those life goals. Maybe then I can teach myself more spanish and maybe I'll learn to move on and leave the past behind me. Maybe then I can find a lost friend...and if not...it's not the end of the world. Things change; time does that. You gotta learn to go with the flow on some things, and pick your battles well. *Sits back and smiles* Everything is gonna be okay...too bad that sounds better when someone else says it.
***
...It takes an honest and true man to experience love, for it doesn't just appear; it needs to be worked for and cherished like a growing child in order to be kept true. Once it is earned, it is the greatest gift any man can give. It is a gift of hope and true emotion, and one cannot surpass the will to do extaordinary things with the rush of genuine affection. Love is unexplainable. It is connotated in the most varied and detailed ways; it means different things to different people. No one can fall out of love. It can't disappear just as it can't appear. Love does not die a natural or normal death. It must be neglected and unwanted, but by doing so, two souls perish. One should not ask for love then throw it away, for that shows that not only is precious love lost, but that a person cannot willingly rest his soul on love alone.
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*Puts pants back on* Wow I can't believe I wrote that last night...I'm really proud of myself. I decided to write on my pants...and the back of my right leg is filled with words. Normal people would draw on them...but my words and my stories are my art. I love them like no other. Talent is as precious as you make it to be...maybe I should go back to piano...