Profile
Name: Kimmi
Age: 16
School: Ohhhh! That's what it's called!
Birthday: February 24th, 1990
Status: No one's wife
-Maybe promises are better left unsaid-
Archives
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
May 2007
My Lovers
CC
Hunter
Kevin
*cymbal noise*
He's Very Pretty Too!
The Friend I Finally Met
El
Diana
Brian
Freddie
Behind the Camera
...Humming...
Once there was a way to get back homeward,
Once there was a way to get back home,
Sleep pretty darling, do not cry,
And I will sing a lullabye,
Golden slumbers fill your eyes,
Smiles awake you when you rise,
Sleep pretty darling do not cry,
And I will sing a lullabye,
Once there was a way to get back homeward,
Once there was a way to get back home,
Sleep pretty darling do not cry,
And I will sing a lullabye.
If you want me,
Tell me now,
If I could be of any help,
Tell me how,
Let me love you,
Like a friend,
Every little thing is gonna go right in the end.
Well I could hold you too tight,
I could never let you go,
But that wouldn't be right...
I can still recall our last summer,
I still see it all,
Walks along the sand,
Laughing in the rain,
Our last summer,
Memories that we made.
We took the chance, like we were dancing our last dance.
Living is easy with eyes closed,
Misunderstanding all you see.
You were all I never wanted anyhow,
...but I sure want you now...
You may say that I'm a dreamer,
But I'm not the only one.
You're asking me will my love grow,
I don't know, I don't know,
You stick around now it may show,
I don't know, I don't know.
I've seen that road before,
It always leads me here,
Leads me to your door.
When evening shadows and the stars appear,
And there is no one there to dry your tears,
I could hold you for a million years,
To make you feel my love.
Bright are the stars that shine,
Dark is the sky,
I know this love of mine,
Will never die.
You looked my way and said,
"You frustrate me",
Like you're thinking of lines and times,
When you and I were you and me,
I took a chance out on the street,
And I missed my chance and chances are you won't be coming back to me.
There were bells on a hill,
But I never heard them ringing,
No I never heard them at all,
Til there was you,
There were birds in the sky,
But I never saw them winging,
No I never saw them at all,
Til there was you,
And there was music,
And wonderful roses,
They had sent for me,
In sweet fragrent meddows of dawn and dew,
There was love all around,
But I never heard it singing,
No I never heard it all,
Til there was you.
The sun is up,
The sky is blue,
It's beautiful,
And so are you.
Saturday, April 29, 2006
Funny thing is...the day isn't nearly over.
I never thought loving again would be possible. I never wanted it to be...but guess what guys, it is. I'm happy now. I love that I'm happy. I want everyone to be happy like I'm happy.
My world is not even close to perfect, but that doesn't matter.
God I'm so happy...
Oh, and...What Not To Wear is quite possibly one of the best shows in the world...
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
I'm kinda iffy this morning. The thoughts of "It's too good to be true" kept running through my mind, and now I'm wondering if I'm right. It's too easy. Now I'm wondering if pain will come along. I'm wondering if disappointment will follow. I'm hoping that I don't get let down. I'm scared that by hoping that, I will. I don't know why I've decided to not be happy this morning. I just have. I feel...scared. Like this is going to turn into everything before it. Maybe the flower is done blooming and it's all downhill from there...
...who am I kidding...
Monday, April 24, 2006
I...I think I'm tired...I'm going to bed...screw you if you don't read my blog...
Sunday, April 23, 2006
So I wake up in the morning and wait for Lindsey. She and I go to the shelter. We really just play with kittens the whole time, and this kick ass dog. He's amazing. I really wanna change his name from 'Onyx' to 'Brutus' or 'Gaston', because honestly...it would fit him so much better. We did 3 hours of...nothing, and then I took her to the bank where her family was. We didn't really talk much in the car. Rent was in, so we just sang the whole time...it's nice being able to say absolutly nothing to her and not worrying about the silence being awkward. There is a slim amount of people that I can do that with.
At around 2 I made it to the salon, and was sprayed and pinned and curled (with velcro curlers...kickass...) to my heart's content. I put on my dress and shoes, and did minimal amounts of makeup. Of course, I have way too much time left, and after showing the wonderful woman who did my hair my beautiful self, I went home for 15 minutes. Silly Kevin, mowing the grass.
I eventually showed up and glitteratized his whole house. We took pictures and all that jazz. His mother showed me her wedding album. She's so sweet. I like her a lot. I petted Abbey too...I actually may like her, despite her insanely small size.
Not to be confused with Kevin's poor time management skills, we left his house a little before 5. *Shakes head* I met Liana, and she's wonderful. I'm glad I can put a name with a face, finally. More people came. We took more pictures. (See buzznet for more.) Amongst many others I met Heather...and she's wonderful. She gets the A+ at making me feel comfortable. The dinner...was amazing...the presentation was that of a high-class restaurant. I almost died...
We eventually made it to East, and the setup was amazing. It really does make OHS dances look like crap. Now, I can't thrust like Liana, but I guess I'm not all that bad. *winks* I can be dirty too.
I was out until 12:30, driving and such...*shifty eyes* I just have one thing to say--I hate cops. They scare the shit out of me. *Laughs* I learned how to drive away BEFORE they see you. Damn cops...(Note: I promise that all cop encounters will not bite me in the ass later.)
Last night...if it could happen all over again...I would ask for it in an instant. There was nothing else going on in the whole world besides what was happening with the two of us.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
I'm pretty much dying right now.
It's funny that it's so deep inside, and yet it's there.
I had a revelation last night while I was out on my drive to nowhere, and I'm dealing with the fact that it just is.
I try to concentrate on other things, but the thought is still there.
I can push through it, but what good will it do me?
It'll still be.
Speaking of...I had to give a presentation in spanish today. With Jenny (Raquel). And Keith (Pablo). Yah...total BS... my powerpoint didn't work and we made up an activity on the spot. It was ridiculously funny...and I'm sure Pablo hates me now. I'm thinking of recruiting Mateo and Pepita for my final...but I don't think Mateo would do it. He's a wonderful child...abusive...but wonderful.
So I think my friendship with Pepita's Michael is moving right along. I'm happy. He's a darling kid. He's so protective over his girlfriend, and so sweet in nature. He doodles. I've never seen a boy-child doodle. He thinks that I should join choir. I've actually been debating that thought for a while now...I would like to...but journalism 1 and 2 are more important...I would do it for a semester...but not year-round. I have an empty slot because the directed studies are 'a lose/lose situation'. So...yup...
Math. I hate math. I hope it dies. I play Sudukos for those 90 minutes. Hey, at least it involves numbers and problem solving skills....
My List Of Things To Do Before This Weekend:
-Finish that goddamn paper in English...it's due Friday
-Buy/Find shoes for formal
-Call Carrie to set that hair appt. time (WAIT THATS DONE)
-Talk to Pepita about Saturday morning...I can't wait to see the puppies and kitties
-Talk to family about going to see the talent show tomorrow
-Talk to Kevin about going to see the talent show tomorrow
-Make sure I'm ready for the debate on Thursday
-Get myself on costume crew
-Play with makeup for formal
-Paint nails for formal
-Coax Freddie
-Ease my mind
...sounds like fun...
Friday, April 14, 2006
I just watched two birds have sex. Why must the male puff himself up before he hops on top of the female? What if she wanted to be on top? How could she take that? That poor, poor bird. Now she's gonna lay eggs that I'm sure she didn't want. She's gonna have bastard children. I would hate to be a pregnant bird...
And...
I have kick ass basketball skills. I definitely beat Kevin again, 10-4. *Giggles* Maybe I should try out next year...
I have to write this right now just to piss my boyfriend off.
Yah, that's right. I have a boyfriend, and his name just happens to be Kevin. *Big smile here*
I'm very happy. I'm back to the bubbly happy that I was last year. It feels so good. It's new, it's fresh, it's exciting and wonderful and great and everything I could ever hope for right now. It's comfortable...I like it.
No one can ruin how happy I am right now.
Changes that I got...
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
If this means nothing, then why does it feel like something?
I am not free...I just cannot see my boundaries...
Sunday, April 09, 2006
What a weekend.
Life is good.
That's about it. More later, I promise.
Saturday, April 01, 2006
I can drive. I got my license yesterday at about 2:30 pm. I kicked Plano ass...*laughs* It really wasn't all that hard. My first two drives were out to Kevin's house...yah I bet the boy feels REALLY special. My sister enjoyed my driving too...minus my crappy crooked parking at Dominicks.
Today...I went out with Kevin. What the hell, call it a date. I went on a date with Kevin. I took him to Red Robin and to a movie- Failure to Launch. V for Vendetta's earliest show was at 9, so he got jipped. Oh well. I got some ice cream afterwards, and we sat in the car and talked. Yes. Talked. Get your mind out of the gutter. (That is definitely one of my new favorite quotes.) It was nice. It couldn't have been better.
Okay, so I was in the mood to write for the first time in god knows how long, so you're going to read it. *Sighs* Don't read too into it...please...
To be or not to be was the question.
The pain is...was...unbearable. Now I know how Caesar felt. I was torn apart piece by piece. A heart of glass shattered on the floor and an empty body lay next to it. I was hopeless and utterly alone…yet everyone seemed to pass me by. I put on a face. I played everything off as an innocent act. It wasn’t.
The pain wasn't just mental and emotional, it was physical too. I wish I realized it before, but I didn’t. My body became the outlet to my pain, my flesh my scratching post. Scabs and scars were scattered about my arms, sadly showing what my simplistic smile could not. I doubted every happily-ever-after belief I once had. My days were spent hiding, and my nights were left to my pain, my tears, and the moon.
I never thought I could love again until tonight.
His eyes are angelic, and his smile is to die for. Maybe examining other beauties is the right thing to do. I feel butterflies, and I turn into a blushing school girl once again. His hand guides me. His arms protect me. His heart cherishes me. He kisses my wounds and they heal. I realized I’ve suddenly remembered what it feels like to get caught in the moment, to light a new fire.
I love. I lose. I live. I die. I remember. I forget. I can do all of these things, but I can never turn back time. The stars may cross for a reason. Juliet could find her Romeo. Love can be patient and kind all over again.
This I will never know unless I take the chance.